## Ch-106.
—
Lacy Yuzuha.
She stood before the Dercia Magic Tower, letting out deep sighs.
It had been an eventful journey.
When she first set out for Alderan, she had thought it would be a pleasant trip like last yearās.
At the exposition, she would admire creative and fascinating magic and items. In the city, she would engage in inspiring exchanges with young mages. That had been what last yearās exposition meant to her.
This year had been dreadful.
An unexpected encounter along the way had prevented her from properly enjoying the exposition, and she had even been caught up in a terrorist attack. Because of that incident, there was a real possibility that the Magic Exposition would not be held again for several years.
The aftereffects of the Akashic Records had been longer and stickier than she had anticipated. She had lain in Maybeldās estate for an entire week.
Her body had recoveredābut the return journey had been difficult. Her heart felt heavy and unsettled.
Even now.
The reason she could not bring herself to step into the Dercia Magic Towerāa place that had always filled her with excitement and anticipationāwas the letter tucked inside her robe.
āHow am I supposed to explain this?ā
It had not been a prearranged meeting, but a chance encounter. Truly so.
But would Elena believe that?
Lacy knew Elenaās mental state was unstable. If she were to misunderstandā¦
āWhat if she thinks Iām a possessor too?ā
That was what frightened her most.
No matter what excuse she gave, as long as she concealed the truth about possessor, she would inevitably be branded a liar.
āThe letterās a problem too.ā
She had not even dared to secretly open it, so she did not know its contents. She could only hope it would not further agitate Elenaās fragile state of mind.
āItād be strange if it didnāt.ā
Considering their history and relationship, it was bound to be a stimulus in some way.
Sighing endlessly in front of the tower would change nothing. Lacy forced her heavy feet to move.
Still, she could not go straight to Elena.
First, she headed for Orcaās room at the very top of the tower.
āOut?ā
āThatās right.ā
She was intercepted midway.
An elderly mage of the tower, face tired and beard unkempt, sipped his pitch-black coffee and replied,
āRecently, it seems Orca has had some inspiration. Sheās been going outside the tower frequently.ā
āInspiration?ā
āSheās conceived a new spell.ā
āThatās⦠rare, isnāt it?ā
Ora, who was presumed to have long surpassed Seventh Rank and perhaps reached Eighth Rank, had set her ultimate goal upon the Akashic Records.
It was a path unimaginably distant.
And yet, a new spell? One that even required leaving the tower?
Lacy blinked in disbelief.
āWhat is she working on while I was away?ā
Surely she wasnāt abandoning the Akashic Records now?
If that were the case, Lacy would not hold back from advising against it. She had willingly offered her own body for the sake of completing the Akashic Records, even endured the humiliation of vomiting in front of that infuriating man.
āIf she gives up now, that means she tested it on me and judged it unviable!ā
Though it had been Lacy who volunteered for what could be considered a clinical trial of an incomplete spell, she felt she at least had the right to complain.
āDid Elena go out with her?ā
āThat child⦠is still in the tower.ā
The answer came with a wry smile.
Lacy let out another heavy sigh.
āHow long?ā
āShe hasnāt returned home in the past ten days. Ahābut she hasnāt locked herself in her room the entire time. Until three days ago, she went out to eat with Orca every meal.ā
āUntil three days ago?ā
āOrca left three days ago. We other mages went to check on her at mealtimes, but⦠we couldnāt even see her face. And we canāt exactly force our way in.ā
Of course.
Within the Dercia Magic Tower, the only two who could spend time with Elena outside of magical research were Orca and Lacy.
āAh⦠right. I heard you reached Sixth Rank. Impressive.ā
āI was in a situation where I would have died if I hadnāt surpassed my limits.ā
āNot everyone can break their limits in such circumstances. Sixth Rank at twenty-nine⦠Heh. Elenaās remarkable, but youāre no less.ā
āThank you.ā
It was offered as praise, but it felt uncomfortable.
As though he were implying that she, not Elena, ought to have been the Tower Masterās disciple.
It could not be helped.
Most mages were eccentric and closed offāyet somehow expected admirable character from others.
Some of the elder mages privately thought that Lacy, gentle to everyone and gifted besides, was more suited to become the next Tower Master than Elena, who neither guided juniors nor respected seniors.
Lacy hated such evaluations.
She feared her very existence might become yet another pressure upon Elena.
It had been Lacy who declined becoming the Tower Masterās disciple.
āElena?ā
Her chamber occupied the entire floor just beneath the topmost level.
As soon as Lacy stepped off the lift, she saw the doorātightly shut.
She glanced at the food placed beside it. The lunch delivered earlier had already gone cold.
āElena? Itās me, Lacy. Are you asleep?ā
Knock knock.
Not long after she knocked lightly, the door opened.
āAh, Senior.ā
Disheveled golden hair. A face thinner than before she left. Hollow eyes.
āWhen did you get back?ā
Stillāperhaps thanks to Orca making sure she ateāshe looked better than Lacy had imagined.
āToday.ā
āI heard you went through a lot. Did you come straight to the tower?ā
āI rested a lot in the carriage on the way back. Can I come in?ā
Elena gave a faint smile and stepped aside.
The room was spacious enough to endure three days of seclusion without major discomfort. It even had a bathroom and bath.
But it was far from tidy.
Spellbooks and research papers were scattered everywhere. The bed and sofa areas, in particular, were a mess.
Lacyās gaze moved between the dolls collapsed on the crumpled bed and the pillows and blankets strewn across the sofa.
āI couldnāt sleep on the bed.ā
Elena said it like an excuse.
She would lie on the bed every night, tossing and turning, clutching the doll she had brought from the orphanage.
Still unable to sleep, she would eventually curl up on the sofa instead.
In the past, she might have drowned herself in alcoholābut after speaking with Orca, she had stopped drinking.
As advised, she chose to rely on magic rather than liquor.
āHave you been eatingāā
Lacy stopped mid-sentence.
She had spotted the crumpled wrapper of a calorie bar on the floor near the desk.
Dry, tasteless.
Lacy sighed and shook her head.
āIf Orca sees that, sheāll scold you.ā
āSheāll say my brain wonāt work properly.ā
Elena chuckled.
Dragging her feet, she went to the sofa and sat down, hugging a pillow to her chest as she stared at Lacy.
āAre you okay, Senior?ā
āMe?ā
āA lot happened in Alderan. Ohācongratulations. I heard you reached Sixth Rank.ā
āI never went around announcing it. How does everyone know?ā
āOrca told me.ā
It wasnāt exactly a secret.
Lacy cleared her throat and sat opposite Elena.
āIn Alderan⦠well, I nearly died. But Iām fine. Not even injured.ā
Why arenāt you going home? What is this state of your room? Were you alright while I was gone?
There was so much she wanted to ask.
But the answers were too predictable.
Home? Just because. Itās more comfortable here.
The roomās messy? It canāt be helped. I didnāt let anyone in to clean. And itās more comfortable like this. Even if I tidy it, itāll get messy again.
I was fine without you. My days are always the same.
Iām glad you came back safely. I was really worried. But Seniorāabout Alderanā
āA lot.ā
The voice cut in suddenly.
āI heard he was hurt. Very badly.ā
Lacy blinked at Elena.
āUm⦠me? I wasnāt physically hurt. Maybe internal injuriesāI struggled a bit with thatāā
āI mean Yuri.ā
She said it with a smile.
āI heard his injuries were severe. After everything ended, he staggered while talking. And in the carriage, he fainted outright?ā
āā¦ā
āOh, Senior wouldnāt have seen it. Orca was moving your body then. I heard it from her.ā
āā¦I see.ā
How should she answer?
After hesitating, Lacy nodded.
āYes⦠it was serious. The opponent was too strong. He couldnāt run. He was protecting me while fighting, so he couldnāt properly evade the attacksāā
āThere was no choice, was there?ā
Lacyās words cut off.
āIf you hadnāt reached Sixth Rank, Orca couldnāt have teleported. In that situation, no matter who the opponent was, he wouldāve had to fight while protecting you.ā
What�
Lacy stiffened.
It was a logical statement.
Yet something about itā
It felt like fingernails scraping across a chalkboard, grazing the surface of her emotions.
āHow was Haryeong?ā
āShe was injured too.ā
āDid she seem to be getting along well with Yuri?ā
āHaā¦? I donāt know. We didnāt talk enough to tell.ā
That was a lie.
It was true they hadnāt spoken much, but she could tell whether the two were getting along or not. Especially at the expositionāthe hostility Haryeong had openly shownā
āDid it look the same as two years ago?ā
Elena asked with a smile.
āBack when Haryeong was my guard, and Yuri was my childhood friend, living together in my house.ā
Lacy couldnāt answer immediately.
After a momentās hesitation, she forced her voice out.
āI donāt know. I donāt know what it was like two years ago.ā
āDidnāt she ask about me?ā
āHaryeong⦠asked if you were doing well.ā
āAnd Yuri?ā
That faint smile looked like cracked glass that could shatter at any moment.
No matter what she said, it felt as though her words would fall into some black void. Lacyās chest tightened.
āI received a letter.ā
In the end, Lacy sighed briefly and pulled the letter from her robe.
The moment she heard the word letter, Elenaās eyes widened.
āItās from Yuri. He asked me to deliverāā
Elena slid off the sofa as if tumbling and reached for it.
Startled, Lacy stepped backābut Elena was faster, grabbing her wrist.
āAhā¦ā
Elenaās trembling eyes fluttered.
āIām⦠sorry.ā
āItās⦠fine.ā
Lacy composed herself and handed over the letter.
Elena placed it on her lap, shoulders shaking faintly.
Her dull golden eyes darted between the letter and Lacyās face. She clearly wanted to tear it open immediatelyābut with Lacy standing before her, she restrained herself.
āThereās something Yuri asked me to tell you.ā
āTo⦠me? Directly?ā
āYes.ā
She shouldnāt stay any longer.
Feeling as though thorns were digging into her skin, Lacy stood.
āHe said he would wait.ā
āā¦?ā
āI donāt know what heās waiting for. Iāll be going now. Like you said⦠I think I need some rest.ā
The carriage ride had not been uncomfortable.
This place was.
āYes. Please rest well, Senior.ā
After seeing Lacy to the doorā
Elena stood there and almost tore the letter apart on the spot.
But she stopped.
This was a letter written and sent by the Yuri of ānow.ā
The letters they had exchanged in the past were with the real Yuri.
This was the first letter she had received from the current Yuri.
Thinking that, she could not tear it.
Biting her lip, she hurried to her desk.
The letter was sealed with wax.
If she forced it open, the envelope would tear messily. But tearing the other side would ruin its appearance if she wanted to preserve it intact.
So she carefully slid a knife beneath the seal and cut it cleanly.
As the envelope opened neatly, her heart pounded with a feeling she hadnāt experienced in a long timeāanticipation.
The letter was not long.
She did not feel disappointed.
It was the first letter. It had taken two years for contact. Rather than pouring out all the accumulated stories, there would naturally still be awkwardness.
To Elena.
.
.
.
After reading it several times, Elena suddenly sprang to her feet.
As expected, it was very different from the letters she had exchanged with the real Yuri.
The handwriting was different.
The way he structured his thoughts was different.
The emotions were different.
Of course.
The one who sent this letter was not her childhood friend.
It was not the Yuri she had last seen ten years agoāthe one whose letters lacked sincerity, whose emotions were absent, whose replies were infrequent, who had once said he would rather she stop writing altogether.
āIn the end⦠heās someone else.ā
The body was the same, but the soul inside was different.
That was what possesion meant.
That difference was the root of Elenaās tangled love and hatred.
Grief for the childhood friend who had died.
A wish that the possessor inhabiting his body might truly be her Yuri.
The fact that she had come to like him.
And the guilt that followed.
āLettersā¦ā
She still had the letters she had exchanged with her childhood friend long ago.
āYuri⦠what did you say to me back then?ā
She remembered the impressionācold, insincere, sparse replies.
But she could not recall the exact contents.
Yuri rarely wrote about himself.
Most of his replies were simply responses to what she had written.
Elena staggered to her feet.
For the past two years, it was the possessor Yuri who had tormented her.
It was because of him that she had resolved to throw herself into magic.
The real Yuriā¦
ā¦was fading from her memory.
āNoā¦ā
She decided she had to read the old letters again.
It had been two years since she last thought that.
She had been too afraid, too pained to open themābut she had never thrown them away.
Elena pulled her robe over her head and left the room.
Mages she passed spoke to her, but she ignored them.
With her hood drawn low, she left the tower and returned to the estate for the first time in a week.
āLetters⦠the lettersā¦ā
Under the bed.
She opened the box she had sealed with magic.
Ten yearsā worth of exchanged letters.
As she overturned the box to sort through them, she realized something.
āThere arenāt many.ā
She understood immediately.
Two years ago, when she went to Aldor to bring Yuri back.
The second floor of that shabby apartment buildingāhis room.
āWe can swap and read them.
They had agreed to exchange letters and read each otherās.
Afterward, at the estate⦠as they grew closer, they had swapped them.
And never returned them.
āā¦ā
Elena swallowed and stood.
When she pushed open the door after two years, it was lighter than she expected.
It opened smoothly, without even a creak.
The room was spotless. Thanks to magic, not a speck of dust had gathered.
Elena pressed a hand to her churning chest and stepped inside slowly.
She did not want to stay long.
First, she went to the desk.
The first and second drawers held only writing tools and blank paper.
The third drawer.
Neatly arranged lettersāand a worn book.
āā¦?ā
She had only meant to take the letters.
But her hand had already picked up the book.
āA diaryā¦?ā
From the handwritingāit was the real Yuriās diary.
Elena flinched.
It was someone elseās diary.
She shouldnāt read it.
That thought followed one after another.
But she bit her lip.
This was the last relic the real Yuri had left in this world.
Yuri had no family.
Among all who had known him, only Elena knew he had died and been replaced.
āI have the right.ā
Forcing her trembling emotions down, she opened the diary.
āAnother letter came from Elena.
He had begun writing this diary at seventeen, when he left the orphanage.
It wasnāt written every day.
Only sometimes.
When he couldnāt sleep. When he hated lying blankly on his bed in that environment. When he wanted to write something. When something swelled in his chest or head and had to be poured out.
It wasnāt really a diary.
It was a trash bin for emotions he couldnāt write in letters.
āThis bitch filled another letter with bragging I didnāt even ask for. Big city life, magic, whatever.
Rotten, festering feelings.
āWhat am I going to do after leaving the orphanage? Something, I guess. Why does she always have to write about how well sheās doing?
Inferiority twisted into hostility.
āWhy would I go find you? So I can run errands for you? How much of a loser do you think I am? Fucking bitch.
āMages die all the time from experiments. Canāt this bitch die already? How long is she going to keep sending nothing but bragging letters? The girl who used to just cry with snot runningā¦
Elena clamped a hand over her mouth.
Her stomach and head churned violently.
āDo you remember what you said the day you left Aldor?
The words from Yuriās recent letter echoed in her ears.
āYou said, āYouāll think it was luck that I came to get you today.ā
She felt like she might vomit.
āYou were right. Meeting you that day was the greatest stroke of luck in my life.
Elena collapsed to the floor, gasping.
The headaches that had subsided in recent days surged back.
Crackācrackle!
Emotion surged like electricity.
The current swelled and swelled.
At this rate, the roomāthe estateāwould burn to ash.
āWouldnāt that be fine? Why endure it? For two years, this place hasnāt been home. Since Haryeong left, she had spent more time at the tower than here. If the house burned down, what would it matter? If necessary, she could always obtain a better one.
This was heart-demon.
Emotion encroaching upon reason, whispering destruction.
Smash everything that hurts. Be free.
The diary. The letters. The memories. The house.
All of it.
āN-noā¦ā
Elena clutched her head, as though being electrocuted.
It couldnāt burn.
There were things here that must not burn.
The doll she brought from the orphanage.
The doll the Yuri who wrote that he wished she would die had given her as a gift.
The letters they exchanged.
The half-year she had not been alone.
The hairpin she had received.
āā¦ā
The swollen current was drawn back into her.
*
*
āHoo.ā
Returning after four days, Orca found her disciple waitingādifferent than usual.
Instead of her customary robe, she wore a white dress.
Her hair, long and overgrown, was not cutābut neatly combed instead of wild.
āYou look pretty.ā
Orca smiled as she removed the vest she had thrown on.
It was different from four days ago.
Not just her appearance.
Something inside her had changedāand it was in the direction Orca had hoped.
āMaster.ā
Elena, who had been turning the blue hairpin over on her knee, spoke.
A twisted smile spread across her pale face.
āYou once said that if one reaches the extreme of magic, all problems that cause suffering can be solved.ā
āI did.ā
Orca gazed at her with eyes brimming with affection.
āYou also said I could become as strong as you. Noāstronger.ā
āI did.ā
At the end of the letterā
He had written that he feared rejection, but wanted to see her again.
He had asked her to leave a reply at the Adventurersā Guild.
āWait for me.
She did not write back.
There was no need.
Some emotions could not be contained in letters.
To convey them properly, they had to meet in person.
āI want to grow stronger.ā
Strong enough that Yuri would not need to protect her.
Strong enough to protect Yuri.
Strong enough to grant Yuriās wish.
āAs fast as possible. As fast as I can.ā
The letter she had reread dozens of times overnight rested against her chest.
She gripped the hairpin she had yet to wear.
āGood.ā
Orca smiled brightly and nodded.
Before that joyous madness faded, she would need to complete the Lightning Prison quickly.
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