**#153. Self-Love (2)**
—
That day, the boy recalledâ
The fear he had felt from that guy.
The humiliation of being utterly defeated⊠by a dictionary.
âWhat kind of lunatic fights like that?!â
Having brawled on the streets from a young age, he prided himself on knowing how to counter most weapons.
Wooden sticks, iron pipes, clubs.
Knives, bricks, whips.
Some of the tougher guys even used brass knuckles or nunchucks.
But one thing he could say for certain:
âNo oneâs ever used a dictionary as a weaponâŠ!â
He had no idea how to counter it.
Now, just the sight of anything square or hard-edged made his eyes water, his limbs shake, and his breathing go ragged.
âIs that how things are done at the Tower? Do they fight with books since itâs a place for pursuing knowledge?â
Suddenly, a conversation with his old mentor flashed through his mind.
**âBooks are stronger than fists.â**
**âWhat do you mean by that?â**
**âYouâre quite good with your body. How about learning magic from me? You could become much stronger.â**
It had been in the back alleys, the first time they met.
Heâd been beating up some kids who had picked a fight with him.
âSo thatâs what it meant. It was a saying about superior equipment.â
Tears welled up in his eyes.
If that was the case, there was no way his brass knuckles could beat the guyâs dictionary.
A proverb was like an immutable truth that applied everywhere.
Ah⊠the Magic TowerâŠ
âWhat a terrifying place it is.â
As the boyâs imagination filled with images of magicians dueling with books and flaunting the thickness of their tomesâ
âHaaâŠ! HaaâŠ!â
Ragged breaths spilled from his lips.
Heâd been running all over the mansion for so long heâd lost track of time.
His heart felt like it might burst any second, butâ
*Tak tak tak tak tak tak tak tak tak!*
âThat bastard doesnât get tired eitherâŠ!â
The ferocious footsteps behind him never ceased, so he couldnât afford to stop.
Luckily, he was faster than his pursuer and had been cleverly using the layout of the mansion to avoid being caught so far.
But with his stamina waning, it was only a matter of time before he got caught.
âShould I just beg for mercy?â
Maybe then he could avoid being bludgeoned by that brutal weapon.
Despite appearances, maybe the guy was open to reason?
But⊠what did *I* even do wrong?
âHeâs the one who started it.â
Just as frustration bubbled upâ
âIsnât that Ain?â
âWhyâs he running like that?â
âHey! Youâre supposed to be cleaning!â
He heard voices from Class C students doing chores.
âSomeoneâs chasing him.â
âIsnât that the Tower guy? Are they fighting?â
âDid Ain lose and now heâs running away?â
Ainâs eyebrow twitched.
âNo way. Ainâs not just anybody, and it looks totally one-sided.â
âDidnât you hear? Yesterday, he lost a 10-on-1 fight against that Tower kid.â
âNo way. Ainâs in Class B. No way heâd lose like that.â
Ainâs eyes snapped wide open.
His forgotten confidence surged back up.
Who was he?
Though lacking a bit in theory, he was recognized throughout the mansion as a super rookie, second only to the top apprentices when it came to practical combat.
He had the skills to move to Class A, but chose to remain in Class B to protect his sisterâa romantic man of the cold sector.
â*Me*, losing?â
It had to have been a fluke.
If they fought again, things would turn out completely differentâlike a full 360-degree turn.
As his self-belief returnedâ
*Wuuung!*
The pale blue mana in his ring, which had paused for a while, began to stir again.
*Wuuuung!*
Then came a replay in his mindâhis fury sparked by one specific memory:
The bloodstained ice replica.
The cruel bastard who had threatened his sister.
âThat bastard⊠hurt my sisterâŠ!â
*Crack!*
Iâll make you regret being bornâŠ!
*SkreeechâThud!*
Ain suddenly stopped in his tracks and whirled around.
But the moment he saw his opponentâs emotionless face charging forward at terrifying speedâwith that awful weapon in handâ
He turned right back around and bolted.
âYeah, no⊠Iâll show him next time.â
He was busy today.
Thereâs a right time and place for everything.
And today was definitely *not* that time.
*Tak tak tak tak tak tak takâŠ!*
At that moment in the chaseâ
Ray was calmly observing the pale blue mana flowing through Ainâs body.
âItâs forming wind and enhancing his movements.â
So thatâs another way to use it.
Impressed, Ray drew the pale blue mana from the air.
It spread throughout his body, and the moment it transformed into magicâ
*Fwooooshâ!*
A powerful gust propelled Ray forward.
He felt so light he might take flight, and the distance between him and his preyâno, his specimenâwas shrinking fast.
ââŠâŠ!â
Ain glanced back, and his eyes filled with terror.
With less than five meters leftâ
*Bang!*
Ain burst into the laundry room.
What followed was a blur of lightning-fast movements.
*SLAMâCLACK!*
He slammed the door shut and locked it.
Then added a locking spell on top of that.
*Bang!*
He raced to the opposite door and threw it open.
*Dada da!*
Finally, he dove into one of the large laundry hampers and buried himself inside.
âPerfect.â
Even he had to admit it was brilliant.
His pursuer would see no one was in the room and assume he had escaped through the open door.
*Tak tak takâtak, tak.*
The footsteps stopped at the door.
âItâll take at least a minute to undo that lock. I can finally catch my breathâŠâ
Or so he thought.
*BANG!*
âŠâŠ?
His heart, which had just begun to calm, started racing again.
âWhat the hell? I did the locking spell properly, even if I rushed it!â
It was confusing, sure.
But it didnât ruin the plan.
Thereâs no way the guy would know he was hiding in here.
âThis is my usual hiding spot when I skip work. No oneâs ever found me here before.â
But thenâ
*Tapâtapâtapâtapâ*
The footsteps drew closer without hesitation.
âŠâŠ?
Still confusing.
But no problem.
Even if he checked the hampers, there were so many optionsâheâd never find the right one immediately.
âHeâll check a few and give up. No way heâd search them all.â
But thenâ
*Tap.*
The footsteps stoppedâright in front of his hamper.
And didnât move.
âŠâŠ.
Still confusing.
But the plan was stillâŠ
âWAAAHHH! DIEEE!â
Ain burst out from the laundry, screaming.
*
*
*
Ayla flinched when she saw Ray return with Ain tucked under his arm.
âDid you⊠kill him?â
âHeâs alive.â
Sure enough, his chest was moving.
He was definitely breathing.
âNo oneâs ever dragged Ain in like that. If anything, itâs always the other way around. Well, you did beat all ten of us at onceâŠâ
As Ayla stood in stunned silence, Ray propped Ain up against a wall and examined the mana in his circle.
The pale blue mana had paused its activityâlikely because its owner had fainted.
âIâll probably have to wake him up to observe anything.â
Just as Ray conjured several cold water droplets into the airâ
âWhat are you planning to do?â
Ayla, watching, asked.
âTo wake him up.â
âIf thatâs it, thereâs another way. Iâll do it.â
She knelt beside Ain, took a breath, and whispered in his ear.
âAin! Help me! Someoneâs trying to hurtââ
âWHO THE HELL?!â
Ain jolted awake, his eyes blazing as he looked around.
Then, locking eyes with Ray, he nearly collapsed againâonly to pull himself together and yank Ayla ten steps away from the âthreat.â
âSis! Your hand! Is your hand okay? That emotionless killing machine hurt you, didnât he? Right?!â
Ayla calmed him down.
âNo. I cut myself. Hailer actually used healing magic on me.â
âYou cut yourself?â
âYeah. You misunderstood.â
While the two spoke, Ray silently observed their emotions.
They were similar, yet different.
Both had far more complex emotional palettes than the average person.
âBut their core colors are different.â
Ainâs was pale blue mana.
Aylaâs was blue mana.
Ainâs emotions flowed freely like wind around his pale blue mana.
Aylaâs emotions, by contrast, were frozenâlocked in place by the sheet of blue mana at her core.
Even the same emotions pointed in different directions.
âBoth of them possess white mana.â
White manaâassociated with concern and worry.
Ainâs white mana was directed at both himself and his sister.
Aylaâs, on the other hand, ignored herself and focused solely on her brother.
âŠThey said they were biological siblings.
Could they have grown up in different environments?
Curious, Ray asked,
âYou two are really siblings, right?â
âYeah. Weâre three years apart. Iâm 17, Ainâs 14.â
âCan you tell me how you grew up?â
âHm, thatâs not too hard to answerâŠâ
âYou donât have to tell that bastard anything, sis.â
Apparently, the misunderstanding had been cleared up, though the term âbastardâ suggested a lingering grudge.
âHe probably used healing magic just to get close to you. Filthy wolves. How many guys have tried to get near you just because of your face?â
Ray ignored the âwolfâ and âulterior motiveâ partsâone word in particular drew his attention.
âNot âbastard.â Call me *hyung*.â
ââŠWhat?â
â*Hyung*. Iâm older than you.â
For Ray, this was an instinctual reactionâsomething ingrained from his time living under a bridge, where hierarchy and titles kept order.
Ain stared at him like he was out of his mind.
âDonât make me laugh. Iâve never called *anyone* hyung before. Do I look like the type of guy who gives in that easily?â
Ray raised the dictionary.
âBut if you call me *hyungnim* instead, we can solve this peacefully. Different word, different meaning. Right, Hailer-hyungnim?â
Ayla asked from the side.
âHailer, how old are you?â
âSixteen.â
âThen Iâm the noona.â
ââŠâŠ.â
âIâm your noona.â
Ayla pointed to herself and stared at Ray.
So Ray raised the dictionary.
âAhem, well, I donât care much about titles. Hailer, call me whatever you like.â
Then, Ayla began talking about her and Ainâs childhood.
âWe grew up in the lower class. Almost poverty level.â
Both their parents were alive, but neither acted like proper parents.
Their father was a gambling addict and a drunk.
Their mother was a materialistic woman always ready to abandon them for a richer man.
Ain clicked his tongue.
âThey were garbage. Barely human.â
âAinâŠ! Donât talk like that. They were still our parents.â
âI donât recognize them as parents. I only stayed because of you. Otherwise, Iâd have run away to live on the streets ages ago.â
He was firmâclearly a line he refused to cross.
Ayla looked at him with sorrow, then continued.
It was a precarious household.
But she and Ain started working from a young age, and somehow, they scraped by.
Ain added,
âSis was an idiot too. What did she see in those assholes to keep feeding them?â
âAin, pleaseâŠ! We were still a family.â
Ain gave her a look of disbelief, then kept talking.
âAnyway, sis and I did every street job there is. Sold gum, shined shoes, delivered papers, washed dishes. Ran street stalls, served at restaurants. Even delivered some shady stuff in the back alleys.â
At that last part, he glanced at Ray.
The look said: *See? Iâm dangerous and impressive.*
The reaction came from somewhere else.
âYouâŠ! I *told* you not to do that kind of dangerous work! Donât tell me youâve been doing it behind my back all along?!â
âNot all the time. Just sometimes. And itâs not that dangerous if you know the tricks.â
Both siblings were sharper than their peers, possessing grit and a fierce determination.
The sequence of cause and effect was unclear.
Had they developed such qualities because they were forced to grow up early?
Or had they been able to mature quickly because they were born with such traits?
Whatever the case, the result was that the siblings, though it wasnât easy, managed to adapt to life on the streets without it being impossibly hard either.
Of course, there were times when danger was unavoidable.
âYou little bastard! Youâre the son of that Felton guy from the brick house on Street 132, arenât you! Like father, like son!â
There were times when fingers were pointed at them.
And when that happenedâ
âThwack! Thud! Crack!
âUgh! Uuugh!â
Ain, one way or another, always made sure to break those fingers so they could never point at anyone again.
âSo what? Iâm an uneducated punkâdid you ever give me anything?â
He did it to keep such words from ever reaching his sisterâs ears.
He didnât care what people said about him.
Parents were one thing.
He was another.
Even if the world had knocked him down and chipped away at him, turning him not into a gem but a rough stoneâ
âThis is who I am, so what.â
The boy was always unapologetically himself.
He was proud of who he was.
And in some ways, he even loved himself.
He thought he wasnât stylish, but rather shaped perfectly to survive in this world.
After all, to deal with the crazies swarming this world, you had to be just as crazy yourself.
âAnyway, thatâs whyâI like myself.â
And in that momentâ
Vwooooomââ!
The sky-blue mana in Ainâs vessel surged uncontrollably.
And at that very moment, realization dawned upon Ray